So Much for Not Worrying

A follow-up to “I’m Giving Up Worrying for Lent.”

[First, Mom and Sisters, everything's fine and I didn't mention what was going on with me because I didn't want to worry people needlessly.]

So my no-worry policy lasted for about three days. Those were good days. On day two, I noticed my right breast was swollen but didn't worry yet. After a couple more days, I decided to see my oncologist.

I have a history of breast cancer, am a breast cancer survivor (invasive ductal carcinoma), and my oncologist has always told me to come in any time. So I barged into her office without an appointment. She saw me very quickly, then told me to give up chocolate and coffee. Let me repeat, chocolate and coffee... Coffee? Grrr... Then she sent me off for a mammogram, an ultrasound and a consultation with a frowny, serious radiologist; who told me I needed a biopsy,

I started to worry...

Frowny doc saw a mass he didn't like on my ultrasound. I saw it too and it was shaped like a flying saucer. I didn't mention this to the technician or to the frowny doctor as I didn't think they would appreciate my observation. (But it really did look like a flying saucer!)

So there ended my no-worry policy. A little surprisingly, I was able to sleep okay the night before my biopsy. In fact, when I woke up at 5 in the morning to get a drink of water, the last thing I'd dreamt was that I was about to watch a movie on a fire truck. I had two thoughts about this. (1) What kind of movie would you watch on a fire truck? A fire safety film? Backdraft? And (2) What a boring dream.

My doctor called me today. “Benign.” Everything's okay. I must, however, continue to forgo coffee and chocolate. So I'm not worried anymore. The cloud that was over our house has passed into elation. I don't know if I'd go so far as to say that God is laughing at me and my Lenten plan, but now everything is good and we're on our way out to fly kites, taking advantage of our extra light.


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